Owen leads Gwen into the hotel, with Rhys tagging along behind. Owen sends Gwen off ahead, because he has something he needs to talk to Rhys about. Gwen looks a little concerned about what that might be, but leaves anyway. I’d assume she was worried Owen was going o tell Rhys about their affair, if it wasn’t obvious by now that the writers have forgotten all about that and are hoping we’ll do the same. What Owen actually wants to do is show Rhys how to use the Singularity Scalpel, since his broken finger kind of runs his aim, and he figured Rhys would be happier knowing that “whoever had Gwen’s life in their hands could, well, rely on both of them.” Rhys nods understandingly, and takes a deep breath ready to do some seriously learnin’. It’s kind of funny how he hates Jack so much, and yet is so comfortable around the guy who has actually been slipping his wife the hot beef injection. Am I really happy with that choice of words? Sure. I mean, I know the ceremony was interrupted and all, but they’re obviously going to finish it off later, and that’s close enough for me.
Gwen’s room. Gwen stares at her Nostrovite-blood-stained wedding dress in the mirror. That’s two for two on bloodstained wedding dresses in the last couple of episodes. I know you’re supposed to wait for three before you call it a pattern, but that’s such an unlikely thing to appear at all that I think it counts, and I imagine it is foreshadowing Rhys’s death. I know, I know, I think everything is foreshadowing Rhys’s death, but hey, it’s happened once already! Jack wanders into the room, smiling predatorily at Gwen. Uh oh. I don’t like where this is headed. “Not quite the blushing bride, am I?” Gwen says, “But then, I’d given up on things going to plan a long time ago.” And yet, not nearly long enough. Great, nice one, Gwen. Jack drops some platitudes as he puts his hands on her shoulders. “I didn’t expect to meet someone like you,” Gwen says. OK, but you met him, like, a fucking YEAR AND A HALF AGO. I think that is plenty of time to realise that perhaps you don’t actually want to marry Rhys. John Barrowman gives a gloriously hammy delivery on his reply; “You’re not the only one who met someone that knocked their world out of kilter.” I’d get even more ragey at that if I didn’t know this was actually Bride of Teeth telling Gwen everything she wants to hear. I shall cling on to the tiny, tiny glimmer of hope that Jack would not actually act like this, even though I know, I know, I know he would. Oh, how I hate you, Torchwood. Oh, and byt the way, oops, spoiler. OK, they kiss. Bride of Teeth evidently gets a little too excited about that and her game face comes out. Oh, Bride of Teeth, I know it’s hard to tell, but Jack’s not actually Angel. Anyway, Gwen headbutts Bride of Teeth, and then starts beating him/her with a candlestick, and then Rhys comes in and adds a chair to the mix, and then Owen bundles them out of there while shooting at Bride of Teeth with his gun, which is probably the most effective of their three strategies.
April 9, 2009 at 10:30 am
I think that it is a very interesting and amusing article. Practically all its main points are true.